So you’re probably wondering: who made THIS GUY (refer to Exhibit A) the authority on being a gentleman?

Exhibit A: Me, Mani Gabble

And instead of laying out my gentlemanly credentials, allow me to tell you boys and girls a little story…

Once upon a time, there was a young lad. He was well behaved, made straight A’s, and was loved by all his teachers and peers. In fact, he went on to become the valedictorian of his grade eight graduating class. Prestigious, right? That’s all fine and dandy but you see, around this time, hormones start running wild and kids our age become self-aware.  And then all of a sudden you’re in high school, these youth are keeping up their appearances and suddenly the opposite (or whichever) sex no longer has cooties, and everyone’s beginning to couple up.

And then there’s me, just going through the same old routine from middle school. Still an innocent and naïve boy with a rather large…

…(ladies, wait for it.. 😉 )…

Exhibit B: The Ugly Duckling (based on a true story)

Yep, you guessed it.

…A rather large MOUSTACHE. And that, my friends, is a one way ticket to the friend zone.

So one fateful, carefully premeditated day when I was about sixteen, I came home with a shiny, new razor. I put down my backpack, walked up the stairs, and stepped up to the bathroom mirror and paused. I wanted to be the guy girls wanted to be with, not be friends with.  I gave myself a good, hard look in the mirror and prepared myself for my transformation. I clumsily brought that shiny, new razor to my face and began to graze the thin, prepubescent hairs off my upper lip.

And right then, a strange thing happened. My life as I knew it changed forever. With a barren upper lip, exposed for the world to see, I had no worries in sight. And all of a sudden, girls were paying attention to me, guys were giving me props, and I started doing things I would not be proud to tell my mother about.  A long story short, I lost my way. A little later, I got jumped. And it wasn’t the hooded hooligans that were beating me down while one of them took my phone and the other my wallet… It was karma. My karma, bringing me back to a little, old place I like to call Earth.

Exhibit C: This one speaks for itself *shakes head*

I was absolutely humbled. Was I reborn with a completely new outlook on life? You know what, as ridiculous as that sounds… Yeah, I kinda was. Upon reflecting on the events and decisions that brought me to this point, I found that I had lost sight of the important things. I had alienated myself from the real friends that had supported me prior to my changing and replaced them with a slew of phony ones. Did I have success with girls? Yes. Was I an asshole?  Yes. Was it worth it? Well.. maybe.. I mean, NO!

Okay, I didn’t say NO right off the bat because I don’t regret a thing. A man (or woman) is a sum of his (or her) experiences and is not capable of turning back time. Regrets serve no purpose. Learn from your hardships and move forward. I would not take back a thing as everything I’ve been through and done has made me who I am today.

So today, I stand before you (in the form of my writing on your computer/tablet/phone/god knows what else’s screen), rededicated to all things good and righteous. Now, don’t get it twisted, I’m not saying I’m some shining beacon of light that all the lost souls in society should strive to follow and emulate. I might be thinking it, but I’m not saying it. No, let me put it out there…I’m not perfect. Probably not even close. I just do my best. I TRY. And that’s got to count for something.


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